User talk:Marina20019/sandbox

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Emily's Peer Review

There is a spelling error in the "Fatalities" section. You spelled recorded as "recored". I like that you added the scientific name of killer whales. It adds a nice touch. Great job editing and adding citations that weren't there before. I think it might sound more cohesive if you say "that has impacted society's opinion of orcas in captivity", rather than "that has made an impact on society's opinion regarding keeping orcas in captivity in marine parks". I like that you edited the introduction paragraph to include the names of the people that Tilikum killed. Etp00 (talk) 18:28, 6 August 2019 (UTC)Emily P[reply]

Dan's review

Nice job adding further polish and citation support to this article, Marina. You've made it a bit more robust, and incremental steps like this from Wikipedia editors working collectively are how Wikipedia happens.

For the most part, I'm on board with the changes that you've made, and Emily caught (and you edited) the "recorded" spelling errors. (I like Emily's suggestion for the "impacted society" change as well -- I might recommend making that change as well.)

Since you're doing good work adding citations, I might recommend adding one more. Under "Fatalities," it notes that 4 humans have died via captive orcas, but that info doesn't seem to be cited. (In fact, the "whalefacts.org" link that occurs right before that indicates that the number might be higher.) Can your revision homework include hunting down research that confirms or clarifies this number?
Thanks for your good work on this!
Daniel.messier (talk) 13:13, 8 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]