User:Optichan/The Dog Dies at the End

The Dog Dies at the End is a true American classic, which is ironic, because JJ Johnson is Canadian. JJ, who's works are normally sharp and caustic, wrote a deep metaphor. This book isn't really about a dog at all. It's about life. Told through a dog. Revolutionary.

In chapter one, paragraph one, Johnson uses the word dog to describe who the main character is. Did he do this because the character was literally a dog? Some may argue that. But some read between the lines. The dog wasn't a Dog per se, but he was a dog. You see, Johnson used this word in a sentance by itself. On a page by itself, as it's own chapter. Most times this occurs is in music, and we're all familliar with music. Johnson made the brilliant move, of telling the reader that it is not a dog at all. It's actually, a dog.

I'd like to adress chapter 3 and one fourth. It is this inforgettable scene, where "They live". An average reader would simply read those words like any other. "They live". But Johnson's style is so unique, that it's impossible to tell. However, one can infer, from the way live, is spelled with an l, as oppsed to a Tooeythan jg, we know Johnson had some form of spelling lessons at one point in his life. The trauma caused from this spelling, is this scene as we know it, through the metaphor of a book. The text says "They live", but they don't live. They spell. Johnson wows us again.

Chapter 12 is really where the book made it's mark. It is right here that the newberry was won. You see, this chapter is made up of nothing more than puncuation. The first time I read The Dog Dies at the End I stared at the infmous semicolon, I didn't read anything in my head. I just sat there. Staring. But then it hit me. He had used a semicolon. A period was completely innapropriate here—Of course! But what of a comma? Would that not work? No, a comma was no good in this situation. And it is with that mind set, that I discovered beneath that semicolon, the most vivid imagery I have ever laid my eyes upon. I knew, right there, that the dog, had died. What came next was nothing less than shocking though.

I turned the page, and there I saw. Chapter 13. 13 is unlucky, I knew it to be true. The dog must have died. But the text reads, plain "even the dog". The world sat stunned. How could this be possible? The dog lived happily ever after. Laws of literature know this to be impossible, how could Johnson possibly have managed to do it? The world may never know. But what the world will forever know, is that The Dog Dies at the End will forever be remembered as the book that changed the workd forever. It's astounding metaphoric depth rocketed the book past Where the Red Fern Grows and Old Yeller. The national impact on the book could not have been greater. The Dog Dies at the End sparked revolution in the 4th world country of Doomtopia, and the slaves were freed (one of which was Jimmy the Doom, who know wrestles for the SWF). Chuck Norris, Bruce Lee, Mr. T, Troy Polamalu and Jesus were all born the same day of the release of the book.

Despite many claims, The Dog Dies at the End, was NOT written in im. It was on a type writer, and an ink feather and all that. It was also NOT published after one draft. Several thousand revisions took place between 1:16 am and 1:18 am. This book was also really published. Really.