Talk:The Writing's on the Wall/GA1
Appearance
GA Review
The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
GA toolbox |
---|
Reviewing |
Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 06:53, 20 April 2023 (UTC)
GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
- It is reasonably well written.
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a. (reference section):
- b. (citations to reliable sources):
- c. (OR):
- d. (copyvio and plagiarism):
- a. (reference section):
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a. (major aspects):
- b. (focused):
- a. (major aspects):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
- a. (images are tagged and non-free content have non-free use rationales):
- b. (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- a. (images are tagged and non-free content have non-free use rationales):
- Overall:
- Pass/fail:
- Pass/fail:
(Criteria marked are unassessed)
This is going to take at least two days, nevertheless I'll start now! --K. Peake 06:53, 20 April 2023 (UTC)
Infobox and lead
- Replace hlist with bullet points per Template:Infobox album
- A space is needed before (Berkeley)
- Pipe Kevin "She'kspere" Briggs to Kevin Briggs (music producer)
- Pipe Beyoncé Knowles to Beyoncé
- Pipe Chris Stokes to Chris Stokes (filmmaker)
- You need to write out the July 14 release date in prose for it to be mentioned in the lead
- Remove "for The Writing's on the Wall" because this is implied
- Pipe Kevin "She'kspere" Briggs to Kevin Briggs (music producer)
- "Rodney Jerkins and LaShawn Daniels," → "Rodney Jerkins, and LaShawn Daniels,"
- "with each of its tracks representing a" → "with each track representing a" to be less repetitive
- "infidelity and separation," → "infidelity, and separation,"
- Remove "the album" at the end of this sentence since throughout implies this
- "hip hop and soul record" → "hip hop, and soul record"
- The Staccato vocals are not sourced as being layered anywhere in the body
- Add a comma after Billboard 200
- "and success of its singles, the album's sales" → "and success of the singles, its sales"
- "Consequently, it peaked at number five" → "Consequently, The Writing's on the Wall peaked at number five" and mentioned the country the certification was in
- "with its accompanying music video" → "with the accompanying music video" with the wikilink
- "became the group's first" → "became Destiny Child's first"
- Pipe Mainstream Top 40 to Pop Airplay
- "The accompanying music video for" → "The music video for"
- "from the group mere" → "from Destiny's Child a mere"
- "noting its immense influence" → "noting the immense influence" and remove its before release too
Background and development
- The Teresa LaBarbera Whites and manager parts are not sourced
- "became the group's manager." → "became their manager."
- The release month of "No, No, No" is unsourced
- Mention the country that the certification was in and add a comma after RIAA
- The "With Me" part is unsourced
- "label their debut album" → "label the album"
- "not hugely successful" as" → "not hugely successful", as"
- "and disliked about the debut" → "and disliked about Destiny's Child"
Recording and production
- Pipe Beyoncé Knowles to Beyoncé on the quote box
- Remove wikilink on Beyonc in prose
- "later claimed the group wasn't" → "later recalled that Destiny's Child was not" per WP:CLAIM
- "the album saw" → "Destiny's Child saw"
- "LeToya Luckett nine and" → "LeToya Luckett nine, and"
- "relationships and financial hardships." → "relationships, and financial hardships."
- "suggested the group to" → "suggested Destiny's Child to"
- Pipe Kevin "She'kspere" Briggs to Kevin Briggs (music producer)
- "where majority of" → "where the majority of"
- The four additional songs produced are not mentioned by the source
- "at the time of the album's production," → "at the time of production," to be less wordy
- "alongside the group's manager" → "alongside Destiny Child manager"
- "defined the album's sound." → "defined the sound of The Writing's on the Wall."
- "LaShawn Daniels and the group members." → "LaShawn Daniels, and the group members."
- Remove "of the song" after new mix because this is implied by the last sentence
- "included on the album." → "included on The Writing's on the Wall."
- "which were recorded" if they were recorded at these two studios then add "both", if separate studios then "respectively"
- "at the Electric Lady Studios in" → "at Electric Lady Studios in" per the article
Music and lyrics
- The tempo part is not sourced for the img text
- "hip hop and soul record." → "hip hop, and soul record."
- "Its instrumentations notably incorporate sounds" → "Its instrumentation notably incorporates sounds" since the source does not mention separate songs
- I don't think as well as is needed before guitar riffs when that is continuing this list; a comma should serve correctly alone
- Most of the commandments and concept album sentence is unsourced
- "with its title-track intro inspired by" → "with a titular intro, inspired by"
- "Rowland, Luckett and Roberson" → "Rowland, Luckett, and Roberson"
- The slinky quote is not sourced
- "by Kevin "She'kspere" Briggs and Kandi Burruss" → "by Briggs and Burruss"
- "Burruss claimed it was" → "Burruss revealed it was" per WP:CLAIM
- Remove pipe on soul
- Remove wikilink on Missy Elliot
- The commandment parts are not sourced for many of the songs; either remove or add source(s) backing these up
- Being in a relationship and the quote about not giving in are not sourced
- "after being abandoned by another woman," → "after leaving another woman," per the source
- The theme is not sourced
- "a protagonist pleading her partner to stay after noticing his loss of interest towards her." → "the group members pleading their partners to stay after noticing a loss of interest towards them."
- Remove pipe on Next
- "to "leave [their] men" → "to "leav[e their] men" per paraphrasing of the source
- "of Rodney Jerkins' prior production" → "of Jerkins' prior production"
- "the group's original manager." → "Destiny Child's original member."
Title and packaging
- "Kelly Rowland revealed: "When" → "Rowland revealed: "When"
- Remove wikilink on Ten Commandments
- "and the album's title written" → "and the title written"
Release and promotion
- The performance being of "Bills, Bills, Bills" is not sourced
- Pipe Soul Train Lady of Soul Awards to Soul Train Music Awards
- Remove pipe on TLC
- Remove wikilink on "Say My Name"
- "the group performing the song" → "Destiny Child's performing the song"
- The March 4 performance being of "Say My Name" is not sourced
- Ditto for the TMF Awards
- Remove wikilink on "Jumpin', Jumpin'" and the performance on July 21 being of the song is not sourced
- Img looks good!
- "On July 9," → "On July 9, 2000,"
- ""Say My Name" and "Bills, Bills, Bills"" → ""Say My Name", and "Bills, Bills, Bills""
- "single "Independent Women Part I" in November." → "single "Independent Women Part I" in November 2000."
- "the group performed a medley" → "Destiny's Child performed a medley"
- ""Say My Name" and "Jumpin', Jumpin'"." → ""Say My Name", and "Jumpin', Jumpin'"."
- "from the album." → "from The Writing's on the Wall."
Singles
- Remove wikilink on "Bills, Bills, Bills"
- "by the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA)" → "by the RIAA" and mention for all of these instances it was in the US
- Remove pipe on certification
- "reached the top ten in" → "reached the top 10 in" per MOS:NUM
- "the Netherlands and the United Kingdom." → "the Netherlands, and the UK."
- "Its accompanying music video was" → "An accompanying music video was"
- "tribute to Tina Knowles, Beyoncé's mother and the group's then-stylist," → "tribute to the group's then-stylist Tina Knowles," since we already know she is her mother
- "as it peaked only at" → "peaking only at"
- "within the top ten in" → "within the top 10 in"
- "Its Grant-directed" → "The Grant-directed"
- Remove wikilink on Wyclef Jean
- Remove wikilink on "Say My Name" and add a source for the single release
- "and the top ten in" → "and the top 10 in"
- "Poland and the UK." → "Poland, and the UK."
- Remove wikilink on Grammy Awards
- Remove pipe on 43rd annual ceremony
- "Its Joseph Kahn-directed" → "An Joseph Kahn-directed" but this is not sourced for the music video
- "won the group their" → "won Destiny's Child their"
- The release date and acclaim are not mentioned by the source
- Pipe Mainstream Top 40 to Pop Airplay
- "attained the top ten in" → "attained top 10 positions in"
- "New Zealand and the UK." → "New Zealand, and the UK."
- "Its accompanying music video was the group's second consecutive" → "Its music video was Destiny's Child's second consecutive one"
- "to rhythmic contemporary radio in the United States" → "to rhythmic contemporary radio stations in the US" per MOS:US and add the wikilink
- Most of the halted info is not sourced
Critical reception
- "received generally favorable reviews" → "was met with generally favorable reviews"
- "adding that "even when" → "adding "even when"
- "the group for sounding mature but" → "Destiny's Child for sounding mature, but"
- Wikilink Rob Sheffield
- Use singular speech marks inside double ones
- "yeah-yeah-yeah paying customer." → "yeah-yeah-yeah paying customer."" to end the quote properly
- For thematic order, shouldn't the NME review be before the mixed and negative ones?
- Remove wikilinks on "Say My Name" and "Jumpin', Jumpin'"
- Wouldn't it be better to add what Corin Larkin wrote about the album since the four stars is already covered in the ratings box?
- "praised the album for" → "praised The Writing's on the Wall for"
Accolades
- Re-order this so the listings are first then awards
Awards and nominations
- Three is too little for a table, so write these out in prose
- Remove the links for the Soul Train awards
- Pipe American Music Award to American Music Awards
Listings
- Keep the table, but write out a summarization of how the album was ranked to year-end lists and mention some notable ones
- Use scope col instead of centering apart from for refs, also lists and refs should be unsortable
Commercial performance
- "In the United States," → "In the US," per MOS:US
- Remove wikilink on Billboard 200
- Remove wikilink on "Say My Name"
- "reinvigorated the album's sales." → "reinvigorated the sales."
- Remove wikilink on Billboard Hot 100
- "the album registered a" → "The Writing's on the Wall registered a"
- "and was the tenth" → "and was the 10th" per MOS:NUM
- Remove pipe on octuple platinum
- "by the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA)." → "by the RIAA." and mention this was in the US for how many copies
- "the album has sold over" → "The Writing's on the Wall has sold over"
- For all the certifications, mention what countries they were in and how many copies or other units for
- "it debuted at number nine" → "The Writing's on the Wall debuted at number nine"
- "the album debuted at" → "The Writing's on the Wall debuted at"
- "It re-entered the chart in its third week and went on to peak at number six in its tenth" → "The album re-entered the chart after three weeks and went on to peak at number six in the 10th"
- "the album debuted at" → "The Writing's on the Wall debuted at"
- "peaked at number ten" → "peaked at number 10"
- "to the top ten in" → "to the top 10 in"
- "Norway and Portugal" → "Norway, and Portugal"
- Remove pipe on fourth best-selling girl group album of all time
Controversy
- Img looks good!
- "LeToya Luckett and LaTavia Roberson attempted" → "Luckett and Roberson attempted"
- Remove wikilink on Mathew Knowles
- Avoid the term claimed per WP:CLAIM
- "favored his daughter Beyoncé Knowles and Kelly Rowland." → "favored Beyoncé and Rowland." per all having been introduced previously
- "to leave the group," → "to leave Destiny's Child,"
- "the accompanying music video for" → "the music video for"
- Remove wikilink on "Say My Name"
- "They were replaced by Michelle Williams," → "They were replaced by Williams,"
- Remove pipe on Monica
- "and Farrah Franklin, an" → "and Franklin, an"
- The stint part does not appear to be sourced
- "On March 15," → with the year per this being a new para
- "the action against Mathew Knowles." → "the action against Knowles." per him being the last person mentioned by the surname
- "named Anjel but also" → "named Anjel, but also" even though the 581 Entertainment part is not sourced
Impact and legacy
- Remove pipe on music critics
- "towards the album, various critics would acknowledge its" → "towards The Writing's on the Wall, various critics would acknowledge an"
- Remove pipe on R&B
- Remove wikilink on pop music
- "called it one of" → "called the album one of"
- Remove wikilink on neo-soul
- Img looks good!
- "Within the period of its commercial peak," → "Within its peak popularity period,"
- "departure of LeToya Luckett and LaTavia Roberson," → "departure of Luckett and Roberson,"
- "against the group and their manager Mathew Knowles." → "against the group and Knowles."
- "the group's success continued," → "Destiny's Child's success continued,"
- Remove pipe on Survivor
- Remove wikilink on Beyoncé
- Remove wikilink on Stereogum
- Remove wikilinks on "Say My Name" and "Bug a Boo"
- Remove wikilink on The Guardian
- Avoid the term claimed per WP:CLAIM
- "Kandi Burruss–one of the" → "Burruss–one of the"
- "Lizzo and Megan Thee Stallion." → "Lizzo, and Megan Thee Stallion."
Track listing
- Pipe Beyoncé Knowles to Beyoncé
- Pipe Kevin Briggs to Kevin Briggs (music producer)
- Wikilink "Independent Women Part. 1" for consistency
Personnel
- Pipe Kevin Briggs to Kevin Briggs (music producer)
- Pipe Beyoncé Knowles to Beyoncé
Charts
- Pipe Nielsen Soundscan to Luminate (company)
Certifications
- Good
Release history
- Good
See also
- Good
Notes
- sold 700,000 additional units → sold around 700,000 additional units
References
- Copyvio score looks much too high at 56.6%; cut down direct quoting to reduce this!
- Pipe Billboard to Billboard (magazine) on all instances for consistency
- Fix MOS:CAPS issues with refs 14, 30 and 64
- Fix MOS:QWQ issues with ref 19
- Add url-access limited to refs 26 and 119
- Remove or replace ref 28 per WP:GENIUS
- Remove or replace refs 33 and 37 per WP:RSP
- Remove or replace refs 35, 36, 41, 42 and 47 per WP:RSPYT on user videos
- Remove the publisher from ref 72
- Fix MOS:QWQ and MOS:CAPS issues with ref 80
- What exactly makes ref 81 a reliable source?
- Add via Google Books to any of the sources using those URLs
- Pipe Sony Music Entertainment to Sony Music on ref 125
- Remove the publisher from ref 177
Bibliography
- Good
Further reading
- Good
External links
- Good
Final comments and verdict
On hold until all of the issues are fixed; that did not go one three days like it could have! --K. Peake 10:10, 21 April 2023 (UTC)
- Thank you so much! I will fix the issues once I find enough time. Bronx Langford 18:17, 24 April 2023 (UTC)
- ✗ Fail now, per the user's request. --K. Peake 07:18, 30 April 2023 (UTC)
- Thank you so much! I will fix the issues once I find enough time. Bronx Langford 18:17, 24 April 2023 (UTC)
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.