Talk:Tahmasp I/GA1
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Reviewer: Amitchell125 (talk · contribs) 08:29, 8 January 2022 (UTC)
Happy to review the article.
Comments made so far
Lead section / infobox
- Link artillery; bigotry (Prejudice); clergy
- The following parts of the section need to be copy edited:
- phases. the Ottomans; with Ottomans; Herat. he led an army; artilirary; which was unknown for the other side; four campaigns to Georgia; a patron of arts; he became despise of poets; many of them making them (punctuation); he is remarked; . an example; . in times however,; diplomate; with Republic of Venice and Habsburg Monarchy; There was; disputes; triggered off; the death of; reigned nearly fifty-two years; Safavid dynasty. Though
- fourteen – 14
- Replace having a hand in with something less idiomatic (see MOS:IDIOM)
- Unlink painters and poets (common terms)
- No commas in , Humayun,
8 References
Suggestions:
- Ref 10 Mit9a - No preview, so link is useless
- Ref 16 New - No preview, so no link useless (alt. source available at https://www.google.co.uk/books/edition/Safavid_Iran/C6SmDwAAQBAJ?hl=en&gbpv=1&printsec=frontcover (no page numbers)
- Ref 30 Str - url available at https://archive.org/details/islamicgunpowder0000stre/page/n3/mode/2up
- Ref 38 Sav7 - 1980 edition url available at https://archive.org/details/savory-1980-safavids/page/n1/mode/2up
- Ref 49 Era - No page numbers, but a url available at https://www.google.co.uk/books/edition/Emperors_Of_The_Peacock_Throne/h7kPQs8llvkC?hl=en&gbpv=0
- Ref 64 Ald - Appears to be a sales page. See WP:VENDOR
- Ref 6 Bro - url is available at https://archive.org/details/newintroductiont0000brow
- Ref 45 Mik - url is available at https://www.google.co.uk/books/edition/Historical_Dictionary_of_Georgia/JNNQCgAAQBAJ?hl=en&gbpv=0
Failing the article
- I'm going to stop here and quickfail the article. It is not well-written and needs a copy edit. You could ask at the Wikipedia:WikiProject Guild of Copy Editors and you've got my copyedit here up to where I stopped (I can see the sections that follow need to be copy edited too). With a rewrite I could see this being a good article. Amitchell125 (talk) 11:55, 10 January 2022 (UTC)