Talk:Katherine Sleeper Walden/GA1
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Reviewer: Cooljeanius (talk · contribs) 03:47, 4 February 2024 (UTC)
LGTM
- It is reasonably well written.
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a (reference section):
b (inline citations to reliable sources):
c (OR):
d (copyvio and plagiarism):
- 27 references at time of review
- a (reference section):
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a (major aspects):
b (focused):
- Appropriate amount of biographical details
- a (major aspects):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- Seems fine
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
Had some large changes yesterday from significant content additions, but they weren't from an edit war or content dispute...Probably fine now.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have non-free use rationales):
b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- 7 images used, 6 of which are public domain, 1 of which is dual GFDL/CC-BY-3.0
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have non-free use rationales):
- Overall:
- Pass/Fail:
Might be worth letting it settle for a few days, but after that it ought to be fine to approve.Probably fine now.
- Pass/Fail:
Cooljeanius (talk) (contribs) 03:47, 4 February 2024 (UTC)
- Admittedly I should have waited some time after making the changes before nominating, apologies. I think I tried to fill out the article 'last minute' and threw in pieces I thought missing. Sorry for the confusion, that was my mistake. Dionysius Millertalk 18:22, 4 February 2024 (UTC)
- OK, I've updated the time-related ones now. Cooljeanius (talk) (contribs) 16:09, 17 February 2024 (UTC)
- @Cooljeanius I saw the request for a second-opinion. What input is needed? And just as an FYI for @Dionysius Miller, the last sentence of the 1st para in Revitalizing and organizing Wonalancet doesn't have a ref as of now, unless it's Boardman 2001, in which case should also be attached as an inline I think. Dcdiehardfan (talk) 01:48, 26 February 2024 (UTC)
- Cooljeanius said that he was inexperienced enough that he didn't feel comfortable putting on the stamp of approval. Also, thanks for pointing that out. Dionysius Millertalk 13:07, 26 February 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller I see. I'm certainly by no means qualified to comment on the source quality and think the content has the necessary breadth and depth. My only concerns would be to make the Lede more comprehensive in terms of covering a bit ab her childhood and actual death. The only big issue I see with the review at this point @Cooljeanius is simply just conducting a spotcheck, which I believe (correct me if I'm wrong) is looking at least ~5 sources on random to see if they are reliable and substantiate the claim. The only thing I see is that Ancestry is cited, which is deprecated as per WP:ANCESTRY, so I would recommend either replacing with a better source or deleting the content entirely. My other recommendation would be merging the final sentence para under Later life with the previous para since one-sentence paras should be used
sparingly
as per WP:PARAGRAPH, but other than that, I think this is really close to GA! And feel free to correct me if I'm wrong about any of this of course. -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:58, 27 February 2024 (UTC)- Just wanted to let you know that I added a sentence regarding her Boston life in the lead, consolidated the later life ending, and removed the Ancestry source. I think that further expansion of the lead may be more visually appealing but I'm not sure what more ought to be said. I believe that death, and wider inclusion of the circumstances, should only be put outside its section when the circumstances of a person's death are a major aspect of their notability. Of course I could be wrong, I'm still rather new.
- Either way, I do want to note that it would probably be helpful if you made a determination in addition to Cooljeanius'. They decided a yes but felt that another set of eyes should check given their inexperience, so it might make sense for you (or another user if you don't have the time) to make a determination also and approve/hold/fail based on it. Dionysius Millertalk 13:25, 27 February 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller Excellent regarding the Lede revisions and for removing Ancestry. I'd still say the stuff regarding Arthur Walden's death might warrant some minor discussion considering again the Lede should still be comprehensive and cover all aspects of the article nevertheless, but of course, I think the Lede as is is quite adequate and isn't a substantial factor for me. I'll look thru the article and first provide some prose stuff. For now, the only major comments I have are using a different word usage for
Katherine was unable to walk on her own power
as "power" may be mistaken for that of the oil burner and recommend improving the encyclopedic tone on this part:Arthur had no small part in contributing to Wonalancet's popularity. The renown for his sled dogs and his breeding program attracted
May I recommend something likeArthur also contributed to Wonalancet's popularity, as his sled dogs and breeding program attracted ...
or something to that effect? Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:49, 28 February 2024 (UTC)- I added a paragraph on Katherine's later life in the lead and changed wording somewhat in a few areas. I do look forward to any ideas you have prose-wise; I'm told I have a tendency to be a little too dramatic in tone frequently. Dionysius Millertalk 13:38, 28 February 2024 (UTC)
- @Dcdiehardfan I've made some minor cleanup changes to the infobox, shortened the short descriptions, added some cats, and done much of the more pressing changes. I do have a couple stylistic questions regarding inclusions, however.
- What are your thoughts on the inclusion of her signature?
- It appears to be the only easily found version of the signature but is rather low quality (image, I mean). Do you know of a method generally used, cases similar to this, and/or whether inclusion follow the existing guidelines?
- Do you believe the Legacy section is worthwhile?
- Dionysius Millertalk 21:35, 1 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller Apologies for not responding for a while, I was busy with some IRL stuff. I'll definitely look at the comments above and respond to them by today and will also intend on doing a full prose review afterwards, more about that later. Dcdiehardfan (talk) 23:55, 2 March 2024 (UTC)
- Ok, infobox appears solid. I'd recommend an SD that's more accessible to a broad audience, smth as simple as American environmental activist might work, but clarify that she is American in the SD. Cats all seem pretty good. Signature is fine, as the image source seems to be reliable enough to warrant an inclusion, I'm not to experienced regarding the image issues so I'll refrain from that (do note that primary sources are frowned upon as per WP:BLPPRIMARY, but since the postmaster doc isn't being used to affirm any information. Regarding image quality, it seems to meet WP:IQR, and I would assume that you obtained the best quality screenshot you could. The low-quality seems fine to me, as there isn't a "quality" threshold for these things, as again it's identifiable and the characters are legible. However, my big concern is regarding the actual source itself, so in your response, let me know if you can find an alternative source, and if not, I'll see what can be done.
- Legacy section is definitely worthwhile, it covers all that it needs to, but I would recommend if you can trying to find sources to enumerate the mountain ranges and other geographical regions after in, in addition to further clarifying how various pieces regarding her life have contributed to the White Mountains history in order to better meet GC#3a. Apologies for the long-winded response here lol, but I'll again get to a thorough prose comb-through by tmrw. -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:32, 3 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Dcdiehardfan Hello! Just wanted to check in on your status and where the article might be at. Let me know if you have any recommendations, concerns, or questions! Dionysius Millertalk 17:57, 12 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller Profuse apologies as I forgot this article was on my agenda. I'll go ahead and look over the changes now. Looking back on the signature, I think this usage should be fine since it technically is an official postmasters record. However, just to clarify, did the image come from this link: [1]? If so, may I recommend putting in that link on the Source section in the file's Wikimedia page?
- And regarding the prose check, I'll do it section by section below. Feel free to suggest any changes/revisions/comments as necessary. -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 20:29, 12 March 2024 (UTC)
- The citing of the signature is a bit of a puzzle; The source's website (which contains a copy of the pdf) is cited and the pdf on the commons is cited (which contains the known history and ownerships) but the singular pdf's original location is not directly cited. I might do some reading today or tomorrow on how far reaching a general citation gets.
- Also, no worries at all on any delays. It is more than understandable. Dionysius Millertalk 20:35, 12 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller Ok, here's my preliminary prose review. I may be wrong ab some of this so feel free to comment. I tried to be as comprehensive as possible, and if you can, feel free to respond with
,
,
Done,
Fixed,
Removed,
Not done,
Partly done,
Comment: or some similar indicators so that I know comments are resolved. And regarding the signature citation thing, I don't see a PDF link on the MediaWiki page here [2]. Either way, that can be taken care of afterwards I think.
- ==Lede==
- Boston-born environmental conservationist →
American environmental conservationist
, you could also pipeconservationist
to conservation movement - Put the sentence of having The Sleepers named after her in the last para, since that would ideally focus on her legacy
her move
Can a better word choice be found for "move", perhaps residency or something a bit more formal? And could you also provide more information regarding when this takes place? If I understood it correctly, I think it's 1890- Wikilink old-growth forest
and moving to nearby
Doesn't grammatically make sense, I think you might've just mean "move"trapped the infirm Katherine
Again, the tone slightly irks me a bit, I would recommend brevity here and perhaps go for something like:There, a fire broke out and trapped her inside
since you've already clarified she was debilitated beforehandrescuing his wife
→rescuing her
, the article is centered around the subject, hence she should be the primary subject of the sentencefight the fire
→extinguish the fire
- Regarding the fire, I would recommend at least clarifying that it occurred in 1947. I also note a slight discrepancy as the Lede states she died 11 months after the fire, but the body states she died 2 years later.
- Boston-born environmental conservationist →
- ==Early life==
- I'd say state her full name of
Katherine Sleeper Walden
in the very beginning - Change
greater Boston
→Greater Boston
well respected
→well-respected
since it's an adjective- Change →
avidly participated in
to avoid repetitive word usage - Regarding the last sentence of the 2nd para, either relocate
through these trips
to the end of the sentence ORto visit family, and came to love ... through her trips
.
- I'd say state her full name of
- ==Arrival at Wonalancet==
- Clarify that Tamsworth is in New Hampshire, I believe proper MOS would be {{tq|[[Tamworth, New Hampshire}}, as it also substantiates the Lede better, I was legit confused ab the New Hampshire part as I didn't really see it until I realized this was it I think
- Eliminate
on a trip
, I think it reads better and avoids repetition of "on a" - I'd recommend revising the entire first sentence to be in active voice, so it's something like
Upon facing serious health complications and receiving a doctor's recommendation to leave the city [insert actual city here, prolly Roxbury], Katherine moved to Tamworth, New Hampshire in 1890
, but this is by no means necessary. - Recommend spelling out Arthur's fullname to Arthur Treadwell Walden
- I'm confused ab the first sentence of the 2nd para here, I think I need additional clarity, I'm confused why she'd claim otherwise if there's no disputes regarding her birthdate?
- I'm also confused ab what relevancy her physical desc by her contemporaries has in the section, it feels a bit out of place and kinda extraneous. Is there a particular rationale for its inclusion? Also, it should be
high-pitched
. And what does "very slight" mean in this context? - Nix the
eventual husband
part, don't jump the gun here - Trim down that sentence so it reads smth like:
Her claims of youth are often attributed to Arthur
. I'd say that the 10 yr age gap isn't notable, but if you feel it is, I'd recommend moving it to that last sentence in the 1st para - Merge the "by tradition eighteen years old" with the second sentence in the para, as I feel that would better mesh
- Wikilink inn
- I think it's a bit too jargon-y, clarify further by what you mean with "work the land"
breed, which is now the...
- I'd relocate that last lone sentence after the "This is where I'm going to live!" sentence since I believe it flows better. That way, you can replace
the property
andthe large property
with Wonalancet Farm. - What's the rationale for including the Majory Gene Harkness blockquote?
- ==Conservationism, activism, and volunteerism==
- ===Revitalizing and organizing Wonalancet===
- Be consistent with how you refer to KSW, you say
Sleeper
in the first sentence →Katherine
- Does Birch Intervale refer to Ferncroft, New Hampshire, if so, I'd definitely recommend clarifying that. The average person I think wouldn't know what or where that is, so clarifying it's in
located in present-day Ferncroft, New Hampshire
or something of the like would help by an untapped tourism industry
→by accommodating a tourism industry
and so invited the AMC officers
→, and thus invited AMC officers
- Again, recommend active voice over passive, so for the first sentence in the 2nd para, maybe something like:
After persuading/convincing the town, AMC leaders and a group of local farmers met a few days later to work on the proposed Dicey's Mill Trail path.
Over the following years
→In the following years
In 1893
→In 1893,
and so
→and thus
- For the first sentence in the 3rd para, do a massive trim as a lot of it is fluff. I'd recommend being concise and saying
Katherine's encouragement of tourism resulted in immediate success as reporters began praising Wonalancet Farm as the perfect summer resort.
Also, if these are quotes, attribute them as so. If not, I'd recommend rewording that last bit to something likea good summer tourist destination
since "perfect" is a bit WP:PUFFERY - Wikilink New England
- Reposition commas in the WODC sentence so the comma is after (WODC) and before saying
- Be careful with the comma placement regarding the 1902 marriage statement, are you trying to say Katherine married Arthur in Tamworth, Katherine lived with Arthur in Tamworth for 12 yrs AFTER marrying. I'd recommend changing the syntax to avoid these ambiguities, perhaps by stating
Katherine Sleeper married Arthur Treadwell Walden in 1902
- I don't think the wikilink for ATW is necessary since it may be WP:DUPLINK, speaking of which I think that should be checked for
- Clarify Wonalancet Farm
widespread renown
→widespread fame/acclaim
, I think "renown" is a bit of an awkward word choice- Again, be consistent with how ppl are referred to across the article. Choose between Arthur or Arthur Sleeper, this applies writ large across the whole article. Ditto for how Wonalancet is referred to.
gained national renown attracted
→gained national renown and attracted
- Final sentence of the section is defo a bit bold. I'd first recommend rewording it since it sounds a bit wonky,
fame of Wonalancet through the modern day
→sustained fame/continuous popularity of Wonalancet today is somewhat/partially attributed to Arthur Walden's personal fame (highly recommend changing renown)
. I'd then also suggest that if a specific commentator or newspaper said that, definitely attribute it to them, so it'd read likefame attributed to Arthur's clout by XYZ
. Also note the consistency points above, be consistent to how Wonalancet and Arthur is referred to as.
- Be consistent with how you refer to KSW, you say
- ===Conservation of the White Mountains===
- Delink New England once you linked it above in its first mention in the Conservationism, activism, and volunteerism section
- Definitely put the Timber Barons sentence a bit later once you provide a bit of context, which you do in the next few sentences.
Also, what's the "Bowl". It doesn't refer to the Dust Bowl I presume.I'd recommend putting it near the Edgar J. Rich quote and rephrasing the sentence so it is likeKatherine's conservation of the Bowl and her leadership in protecting the region against New England's "Timber Barons" was considered among her most important accomplishments.
I'd even recommend relocating it to Legacy as it'll help flesh out the section a bit more By the 1880s rural
→By the 1880s, rural
- Change the word choice of "swath" to smth like "area", it could be conflated with swathe which I don't think is what you're referring to here
- Split and reframe that sentence so it's smth like this
A cycle began in which a wide area of forest would be clearcut, and logging/lumber companies would litter downed logs, dried brush, and slashings over large areas. Hot coals and sparks from nearby railways could potentially ignite the readily supplied kindling
- Speaking of which, not sure what "readily supplied kindling" refers to. Do you mean to say that fires were caused?
In response to the crisis Congress
→In response to the crisis, Congress
- What is the "newly formed commission"? Also clarify that National Forests is a new classification for natural areas that are federally protected as ordained per the legislation, that would be helpful.
- Clarify that the White Mountains was designated a National Forest too and wikilink it specifically to the WMNF page
- Ahh...that's what The Bowl is...In that case, I'd definitely take the advice above regarding the Timber Barons sentence
- Be consistent with how acres are labelled, you label the 3k acres in prose thru
three thousand acres
but use the actual convert template for other acre figures. Also, clarify what "option" refers to. Does it presumably refer to option fee or something? - Wikilink American NE
- Cut the fluff a bit, "important and valuable" is a tautology, so I'd recommend shortening it down to
and regarded as an important site for research
. Also, this could be relocated to Legacy too, if you think about it. I'll let you give your two-cents on this one. - Wikilink centennial
Her efforts were successful enough that the French government awarded Katherine an official recognition and award for her efforts
Very tautological I think.She received an official recognition from the French government for her efforts
. Also, do you know what this recognition was?
- ==Later life==
- Again, note consistency regarding Arthur and Wonalancet/Wonalancet Farm
- Put a comma after
until the early 1930s
- Since the GD part sounds awkward, let me recommend smth like this:
Katherine and Arthur ran Wonalancet Farm until the 1930s, when they began facing financial difficulties due to the Great Depression and the automobile's impact on travel
. There are sources that claim
→Other sources claim
, and I'd reword moving to smth like "relocation"These sources claim
→They also allege/purport
, eliminate "that", changeforced out of the farmhouse
→evicted from the farmhouse and forced into a small cottage
,over the infirm Katherine in Arthur's absence
→over Katherine during Arthur's absence
These sources further claim
→Moreover, they claim
orFurthermore, they state
, no need to reintroduce Arthur as Katherine's husband,the couple's belongings
→their belongings
In either case,
→Nevertheless,
,fell on hard times
sounds really weird, definitely reword that somehow- Again, consistency regarding spelling out acre figures in prose or using the convert template, applies for the 215 acre and 57 acre figs
- Clarify the stuff regarding the 57 acres tract, did you mean to say that the WODC used Katherine's 57 acres to create the Gordon Path and Ainsworth Trail?
and the trails link Chinook Trail
→and it links Chinook Trail
, clarify that National Forest refers to the WMNF specificallycaused a fire which quickly spread
→caused a fire, which quickly spread
- Cross apply
fight the fire
comment from the Lede here, I'd also recommendand was killed by the blaze
→, but was killed attempting to do so
church which she organized the reconstruction of
→church in which she organized the reconstruction of
- Relocate the stuff ab having a steeple and bell dedicated to her to the Legacy
- ==Legacy==
- See above ab stuff I think should be relocated here and let me know what you think ab it
- Since you already clarify protecting The Bowl is one of her greatest accomplishments, you can eliminate it from Conservation of the White Mountains, also I'd even recommend mentioning that in the Lede 2nd para
- Eliminate
now vibrant
- Make the entire section all one big para, I don't see the need for two separate ones
- PS: Wasn't expecting it'd be so long lol
- -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 22:28, 12 March 2024 (UTC)
- Alrighty! I'll get cracking, thank you for the depth and effort! Dionysius Millertalk 12:46, 13 March 2024 (UTC)
- ==Lede==
- Boston-born environmental conservationist →
American environmental conservationist
, you could also pipeconservationist
to conservation movementDone
- Put the sentence of having The Sleepers named after her in the last para, since that would ideally focus on her legacy
Done
her move
Can a better word choice be found for "move", perhaps residency or something a bit more formal? And could you also provide more information regarding when this takes place? If I understood it correctly, I think it's 1890Done
- Wikilink old-growth forest
Done
and moving to nearby
Doesn't grammatically make sense, I think you might've just mean "move"Done
trapped the infirm Katherine
Again, the tone slightly irks me a bit, I would recommend brevity here and perhaps go for something like:There, a fire broke out and trapped her inside
since you've already clarified she was debilitated beforehandDone
rescuing his wife
→rescuing her
, the article is centered around the subject, hence she should be the primary subject of the sentenceDone
fight the fire
→extinguish the fire
Done
- Regarding the fire, I would recommend at least clarifying that it occurred in 1947. I also note a slight discrepancy as the Lede states she died 11 months after the fire, but the body states she died 2 years later.
Done(Wow, can't believe that I missed that)
- Boston-born environmental conservationist →
- ==Early life==
- I'd say state her full name of
Katherine Sleeper Walden
in the very beginningPartly done I'm torn on that due to Katherine's name at birth was different than at death due to marriage.
- Change
greater Boston
→Greater Boston
Done
well respected
→well-respected
since it's an adjectiveDone
- Change →
avidly participated in
to avoid repetitive word usageComment:I'm assuming you did this already?
- Regarding the last sentence of the 2nd para, either relocate
through these trips
to the end of the sentence ORto visit family, and came to love ... through her trips
.Done
- I'd say state her full name of
- ==Arrival at Wonalancet==
- Clarify that Tamsworth is in New Hampshire, I believe proper MOS would be {{tq|[[Tamworth, New Hampshire}}, as it also substantiates the Lede better, I was legit confused ab the New Hampshire part as I didn't really see it until I realized this was it I think
Done
- Eliminate
on a trip
, I think it reads better and avoids repetition of "on a"Done
- I'd recommend revising the entire first sentence to be in active voice, so it's something like
Upon facing serious health complications and receiving a doctor's recommendation to leave the city [insert actual city here, prolly Roxbury], Katherine moved to Tamworth, New Hampshire in 1890
, but this is by no means necessary.DoneChanged the order of the sentence's clauses
- Recommend spelling out Arthur's fullname to Arthur Treadwell Walden
Done
- I'm confused ab the first sentence of the 2nd para here, I think I need additional clarity, I'm confused why she'd claim otherwise if there's no disputes regarding her birthdate?
DoneThis one's a bit confusing. The answer is: I'm as confused as you and there are only theories published regarding this and all are phrased as hypotheticals. Did my best to clarify the lack of clarity
- I'm also confused ab what relevancy her physical desc by her contemporaries has in the section, it feels a bit out of place and kinda extraneous. Is there a particular rationale for its inclusion? Also, it should be
high-pitched
. And what does "very slight" mean in this context?DoneChanged it up a bit, let me know if it likely isn't worthy of inclusion.
- Nix the
eventual husband
part, don't jump the gun hereDoneFair, fair
- Trim down that sentence so it reads smth like:
Her claims of youth are often attributed to Arthur
. I'd say that the 10 yr age gap isn't notable, but if you feel it is, I'd recommend moving it to that last sentence in the 1st paraPartly done Changed a good amount, not sure if you still feel this necessary
- Merge the "by tradition eighteen years old" with the second sentence in the para, as I feel that would better mesh
Done
- Wikilink inn
Done
- I think it's a bit too jargon-y, clarify further by what you mean with "work the land"
Done
breed, which is now the...
Done
- I'd relocate that last lone sentence after the "This is where I'm going to live!" sentence since I believe it flows better. That way, you can replace
the property
andthe large property
with Wonalancet Farm.Done
- What's the rationale for including the Majory Gene Harkness blockquote?
Comment:The goal with the quote is to introduce the character/charisma of Katherine as it relates to her later achievements. I suppose my thought was to put in a source which cites the importance of her arrival in the section on her arrival. Additionally, it reinforces her organizational skills going into the section on organization.
- Clarify that Tamsworth is in New Hampshire, I believe proper MOS would be {{tq|[[Tamworth, New Hampshire}}, as it also substantiates the Lede better, I was legit confused ab the New Hampshire part as I didn't really see it until I realized this was it I think
- ==Conservationism, activism, and volunteerism==
- ===Revitalizing and organizing Wonalancet===
- Be consistent with how you refer to KSW, you say
Sleeper
in the first sentence →Katherine
Done
- Does Birch Intervale refer to Ferncroft, New Hampshire, if so, I'd definitely recommend clarifying that. The average person I think wouldn't know what or where that is, so clarifying it's in
located in present-day Ferncroft, New Hampshire
or something of the like would helpComment:I'm not certain how best to make that clarification. Birch Intervale was the name of Wonalancet prior to the town's first post office. Meaning there is no Birch Intervale because it is just Wonalancet before it was connected via post
by an untapped tourism industry
→by accommodating a tourism industry
Done
and so invited the AMC officers
→, and thus invited AMC officers
Done
- Again, recommend active voice over passive, so for the first sentence in the 2nd para, maybe something like:
After persuading/convincing the town, AMC leaders and a group of local farmers met a few days later to work on the proposed Dicey's Mill Trail path.
Done
Over the following years
→In the following years
Done
In 1893
→In 1893,
Done
and so
→and thus
Done
- For the first sentence in the 3rd para, do a massive trim as a lot of it is fluff. I'd recommend being concise and saying
Katherine's encouragement of tourism resulted in immediate success as reporters began praising Wonalancet Farm as the perfect summer resort.
Also, if these are quotes, attribute them as so. If not, I'd recommend rewording that last bit to something likea good summer tourist destination
since "perfect" is a bit WP:PUFFERYDoneWP:Peacock is an easy trap to fall into :(
- Wikilink New England
Done
- Reposition commas in the WODC sentence so the comma is after (WODC) and before saying
DoneMy highschool English teacher would be very unhappy with encyclopedic quotation formatting
- Be careful with the comma placement regarding the 1902 marriage statement, are you trying to say Katherine married Arthur in Tamworth, Katherine lived with Arthur in Tamworth for 12 yrs AFTER marrying. I'd recommend changing the syntax to avoid these ambiguities, perhaps by stating
Katherine Sleeper married Arthur Treadwell Walden in 1902
Done
- I don't think the wikilink for ATW is necessary since it may be WP:DUPLINK, speaking of which I think that should be checked for
Not doneTo be honest, I'm not completely certain on the specific guideline, but ATW is not linked in this section prior to the section's last paragraph so I think that means the link is proper?
- Clarify Wonalancet Farm
Done
widespread renown
→widespread fame/acclaim
, I think "renown" is a bit of an awkward word choiceDone
- Again, be consistent with how ppl are referred to across the article. Choose between Arthur or Arthur Sleeper, this applies writ large across the whole article. Ditto for how Wonalancet is referred to.
Done and
Done
gained national renown attracted
→gained national renown and attracted
Done
- Final sentence of the section is defo a bit bold. I'd first recommend rewording it since it sounds a bit wonky,
fame of Wonalancet through the modern day
→sustained fame/continuous popularity of Wonalancet today is somewhat/partially attributed to Arthur Walden's personal fame (highly recommend changing renown)
. I'd then also suggest that if a specific commentator or newspaper said that, definitely attribute it to them, so it'd read likefame attributed to Arthur's clout by XYZ
. Also note the consistency points above, be consistent to how Wonalancet and Arthur is referred to as.Done I tend to find the most clear and pretty way to make a bold statement is to make the bold assertion and use a direct and clear citation to a verifiable source that says exactly that. So I tend to lean into the idea that perspective on a claim ought to be in the given citation where reasonable/possible.
- Be consistent with how you refer to KSW, you say
- ===Conservation of the White Mountains===
- Delink New England once you linked it above in its first mention in the Conservationism, activism, and volunteerism section
Done
- Definitely put the Timber Barons sentence a bit later once you provide a bit of context, which you do in the next few sentences.
Also, what's the "Bowl". It doesn't refer to the Dust Bowl I presume.I'd recommend putting it near the Edgar J. Rich quote and rephrasing the sentence so it is likeKatherine's conservation of the Bowl and her leadership in protecting the region against New England's "Timber Barons" was considered among her most important accomplishments.
I'd even recommend relocating it to Legacy as it'll help flesh out the section a bit morePartly doneI worked on implementing this fully but it was proving a difficult task to properly flow. So, while keeping much of the formatting and placement the same, I changed some phrasing and copied over what fit to the legacy section.
By the 1880s rural
→By the 1880s, rural
Done
- Change the word choice of "swath" to smth like "area", it could be conflated with swathe which I don't think is what you're referring to here
Done
- Split and reframe that sentence so it's smth like this
A cycle began in which a wide area of forest would be clearcut, and logging/lumber companies would litter downed logs, dried brush, and slashings over large areas. Hot coals and sparks from nearby railways could potentially ignite the readily supplied kindling
Done
- Speaking of which, not sure what "readily supplied kindling" refers to. Do you mean to say that fires were caused?
Doneyes, wildfires caused major distress within local communities as a result of the logging practices used. I like the phrase readily provided kindling but if you insist on it later I'll replace it.
In response to the crisis Congress
→In response to the crisis, Congress
Done
- What is the "newly formed commission"? Also clarify that National Forests is a new classification for natural areas that are federally protected as ordained per the legislation, that would be helpful.
Done
- Clarify that the White Mountains was designated a National Forest too and wikilink it specifically to the WMNF page
Done
- Ahh...that's what The Bowl is...In that case, I'd definitely take the advice above regarding the Timber Barons sentence
- Be consistent with how acres are labelled, you label the 3k acres in prose thru
three thousand acres
but use the actual convert template for other acre figures. Also, clarify what "option" refers to. Does it presumably refer to option fee or something?Done
- Wikilink American NE
Done
- Cut the fluff a bit, "important and valuable" is a tautology, so I'd recommend shortening it down to
and regarded as an important site for research
. Also, this could be relocated to Legacy too, if you think about it. I'll let you give your two-cents on this one.DoneI don't know location-wise to be honest. I think I like it as-is partly just because I'm uncertain where to put it in the Legacy section
- Wikilink centennial
Done
Her efforts were successful enough that the French government awarded Katherine an official recognition and award for her efforts
Very tautological I think.She received an official recognition from the French government for her efforts
. Also, do you know what this recognition was?DoneI do not. It is sourced twice that she received an award but I reckon that I'd have to physically visit the Wonalancet historical society's records for an answer. Even then they most likely still might not know.
- Delink New England once you linked it above in its first mention in the Conservationism, activism, and volunteerism section
- ==Later life==
- Again, note consistency regarding Arthur and Wonalancet/Wonalancet Farm
Done
- Put a comma after
until the early 1930s
Done
- Since the GD part sounds awkward, let me recommend smth like this:
Katherine and Arthur ran Wonalancet Farm until the 1930s, when they began facing financial difficulties due to the Great Depression and the automobile's impact on travel
.Done
There are sources that claim
→Other sources claim
, and I'd reword moving to smth like "relocation"Done
These sources claim
→They also allege/purport
, eliminate "that", changeforced out of the farmhouse
→evicted from the farmhouse and forced into a small cottage
,over the infirm Katherine in Arthur's absence
→over Katherine during Arthur's absence
Done
These sources further claim
→Moreover, they claim
orFurthermore, they state
, no need to reintroduce Arthur as Katherine's husband,the couple's belongings
→their belongings
Done
In either case,
→Nevertheless,
,fell on hard times
sounds really weird, definitely reword that somehowDone
- Again, consistency regarding spelling out acre figures in prose or using the convert template, applies for the 215 acre and 57 acre figs
Done
- Clarify the stuff regarding the 57 acres tract, did you mean to say that the WODC used Katherine's 57 acres to create the Gordon Path and Ainsworth Trail?
Done
and the trails link Chinook Trail
→and it links Chinook Trail
, clarify that National Forest refers to the WMNF specificallyDone
caused a fire which quickly spread
→caused a fire, which quickly spread
Not done
- Cross apply
fight the fire
comment from the Lede here, I'd also recommendand was killed by the blaze
→, but was killed attempting to do so
Done
church which she organized the reconstruction of
→church in which she organized the reconstruction of
Partly done
- Relocate the stuff ab having a steeple and bell dedicated to her to the Legacy
Done
- Again, note consistency regarding Arthur and Wonalancet/Wonalancet Farm
- ==Legacy==
- See above ab stuff I think should be relocated here and let me know what you think ab it
Done
- Since you already clarify protecting The Bowl is one of her greatest accomplishments, you can eliminate it from Conservation of the White Mountains, also I'd even recommend mentioning that in the Lede 2nd para
Done
- Eliminate
now vibrant
Done
- Make the entire section all one big para, I don't see the need for two separate ones
Partly done One paragraph split by a quote
- See above ab stuff I think should be relocated here and let me know what you think ab it
- ==Lede==
- note:
- I made an effort to standardize naming to where full names are used at introduction (not counting lead) and first names for the rest of the time unless a specific reason is clearly present. Further that Wonalancet should refer solely to the town and Wonalancet Farm to the inn.
- Thank you so so much for the detail and time you put into this! These are some amazing points that greatly increase the value of the article. Dionysius Millertalk 19:46, 13 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller Of course, it's an honor, and I'm very glad that you found the review helpful. We're almost done with the prose stuff. After this part, I'll then do the spotcheck and source verification, in addition to taking a look at the image captions. I think the rigor of this prose review means we kill 3 birds with 1 stone, as we knock out Criteria 1, 3, and 4. Apologies if the actual prose review itself wasn't tidy, I probably should've formatted it in a table or something, but nevertheless glad it worked out rather decently in the end. Most of the prose stuff is pretty good, I'll just address all the outstanding concerns below. Again, if possible, use the same visual identifiers as above, I appreciate it very much and let me know once you have resolved these concerns!
- I'd say state her full name of Katherine Sleeper Walden in the very beginning
Partly done I'm torn on that due to Katherine's name at birth was different than at death due to marriage. In that case, I would say this DEFINITELY should be noted in the article that there's a discrepancy in regards to birth and death name. I'd say first have a source to corroborate her birth name, and I believe the norm for BLPs is the edit the Born parameter on the infobox and actually insert the birth name (using Ulysses S. Grant and Barbara Bush as an example), same thing for the actual prose.
- Regarding the "avidly participated" in, I believe I didn't do it, but would recommend changing the
avidly attended
toavidly participated
just to vary the word choice and also gives a sense of her being active in the club rather than simply just being a member, as I assume she was more the former. - Trim down that sentence so it reads smth like: Her claims of youth are often attributed to Arthur. I'd say that the 10 yr age gap isn't notable, but if you feel it is, I'd recommend moving it to that last sentence in the 1st para
Partly done Changed a good amount, not sure if you still feel this necessary I think you actually did a great job and am happy with the section. The significance of the 10 yr age gap makes sense once it's presented properly in context. I now interpret it as being that Katherine was actually 28, but she claimed she was younger to be closer with Arthur and the stuff ab contemporaries makes sense.
- What's the rationale for including the Majory Gene Harkness blockquote?
Comment::The goal with the quote is to introduce the character/charisma of Katherine as it relates to her later achievements. I suppose my thought was to put in a source which cites the importance of her arrival in the section on her arrival. Additionally, it reinforces her organizational skills going into the section on organization. Gotcha, that makes sense, I just felt it was a bit awkward and shoehorned as it breaks the flow imo. I would highly recommend that like the Edgar J. Rich quote, you relocate it to Legacy since it's more specifically about her accomplishments rather than her actual activities, which is the focus of that particular section.
- Does Birch Intervale refer to Ferncroft, New Hampshire, if so, I'd definitely recommend clarifying that. The average person I think wouldn't know what or where that is, so clarifying it's in located in present-day Ferncroft, New Hampshire or something of the like would help
Comment: I'm not certain how best to make that clarification. Birch Intervale was the name of Wonalancet prior to the town's first post office. Meaning there is no Birch Intervale because it is just Wonalancet before it was connected via post I see, I looked at the article and think you actually addressed it very well, so I'm also happy regarding this comment. The wikilink definitely clears things up here, and the rename now makes sense.
- I don't think the wikilink for ATW is necessary since it may be WP:DUPLINK, speaking of which I think that should be checked for
Not done To be honest, I'm not completely certain on the specific guideline, but ATW is not linked in this section prior to the section's last paragraph so I think that means the link is proper? I'm also a bit rusty when it comes to the more technical MOS requirements. Looking back on it, I see that ATW is linked twice in two distinct headings, which I think is allowed in DUPLINK, so I believe this should be good.
- Definitely put the Timber Barons sentence a bit later once you provide a bit of context, which you do in the next few sentences. I'd recommend putting it near the Edgar J. Rich quote and rephrasing the sentence so it is like Katherine's conservation of the Bowl and her leadership in protecting the region against New England's "Timber Barons" was considered among her most important accomplishments. I'd even recommend relocating it to Legacy as it'll help flesh out the section a bit more
Partly done I worked on implementing this fully but it was proving a difficult task to properly flow. So, while keeping much of the formatting and placement the same, I changed some phrasing and copied over what fit to the legacy section. I comprehend, it definitely does seem a bit difficult to do. I'd highly recommend relocating that
Often considered her most important and lasting achievement was her fight against the New England "Timber Barons" and her protection of the Bowl.
to Legacy since it's definitely more of a retrospective and reflective declaration imo, and thus more fit for that section while the Conservation section objectively describes her actions in that time period.- On this tangent, I'll introduce another thing. I'll contest this:
The Bowl, now officially called The Bowl Research Natural Area, is one of the last untouched old-growth forests in the American Northeast and is thus regarded as an important site for research.
I would also definitely recommend relocating this material to Legacy for the same rationale above, and connecting this to the sentence of her protection regarding the Bowl, all of this being in Legacy, as I think it'll flow well in the section. three thousand acres (1,200 ha)
Again, note consistency regarding the acreage figs. Good job on including the hectacre fig, but I believe it should be presented numerically, such that it reads3,000 acres (1,200 ha)
. Similar thing for84,000 acres (340 km2)
, which for some reason is converted to km^2 and not ha.- Consistency in the prose of how The Bowl is presented mid-sentence, is it the Bowl in midsentence (kinda like how the consensus is to refer to The Beatles as "the Beatles" mid-sentence and not "The Beatles") or The Bowl?
- To avoid reading like WP:PROSELINE, instead of saying
In 1914,
for the centennial part, may I suggestThat same year,
instead and also merging that part with the para ab the Bowl protection in that same section.
- On this tangent, I'll introduce another thing. I'll contest this:
- I concede the "caused a fire" thing as I realize it's all a part of the same clause.
- Note that under Legacy, the Wonalancet Union Chapel sentence is still uncited.
- Also, do note WP:LEADCITE, while the citations on the Lede are good, they are not needed since you do discuss their contents in the body.
- I'd say state her full name of Katherine Sleeper Walden in the very beginning
- -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:47, 13 March 2024 (UTC)
- Alrighty! I'll get cracking, thank you for the depth and effort! Dionysius Millertalk 12:46, 13 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Dcdiehardfan Hello! Just wanted to check in on your status and where the article might be at. Let me know if you have any recommendations, concerns, or questions! Dionysius Millertalk 17:57, 12 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller Apologies for not responding for a while, I was busy with some IRL stuff. I'll definitely look at the comments above and respond to them by today and will also intend on doing a full prose review afterwards, more about that later. Dcdiehardfan (talk) 23:55, 2 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller Excellent regarding the Lede revisions and for removing Ancestry. I'd still say the stuff regarding Arthur Walden's death might warrant some minor discussion considering again the Lede should still be comprehensive and cover all aspects of the article nevertheless, but of course, I think the Lede as is is quite adequate and isn't a substantial factor for me. I'll look thru the article and first provide some prose stuff. For now, the only major comments I have are using a different word usage for
- @Dionysius Miller I see. I'm certainly by no means qualified to comment on the source quality and think the content has the necessary breadth and depth. My only concerns would be to make the Lede more comprehensive in terms of covering a bit ab her childhood and actual death. The only big issue I see with the review at this point @Cooljeanius is simply just conducting a spotcheck, which I believe (correct me if I'm wrong) is looking at least ~5 sources on random to see if they are reliable and substantiate the claim. The only thing I see is that Ancestry is cited, which is deprecated as per WP:ANCESTRY, so I would recommend either replacing with a better source or deleting the content entirely. My other recommendation would be merging the final sentence para under Later life with the previous para since one-sentence paras should be used
- Cooljeanius said that he was inexperienced enough that he didn't feel comfortable putting on the stamp of approval. Also, thanks for pointing that out. Dionysius Millertalk 13:07, 26 February 2024 (UTC)
- @Cooljeanius I saw the request for a second-opinion. What input is needed? And just as an FYI for @Dionysius Miller, the last sentence of the 1st para in Revitalizing and organizing Wonalancet doesn't have a ref as of now, unless it's Boardman 2001, in which case should also be attached as an inline I think. Dcdiehardfan (talk) 01:48, 26 February 2024 (UTC)
- OK, I've updated the time-related ones now. Cooljeanius (talk) (contribs) 16:09, 17 February 2024 (UTC)
Love me some prose editing
- I'd say state her full name of Katherine Sleeper Walden in the very beginning
Partly done I'm torn on that due to Katherine's name at birth was different than at death due to marriage. In that case, I would say this DEFINITELY should be noted in the article that there's a discrepancy in regards to birth and death name. I'd say first have a source to corroborate her birth name, and I believe the norm for BLPs is the edit the Born parameter on the infobox and actually insert the birth name (using Ulysses S. Grant and Barbara Bush as an example), same thing for the actual prose.
Done
- Regarding the "avidly participated" in, I believe I didn't do it, but would recommend changing the
avidly attended
toavidly participated
just to vary the word choice and also gives a sense of her being active in the club rather than simply just being a member, as I assume she was more the former.Done
- Trim down that sentence so it reads smth like: Her claims of youth are often attributed to Arthur. I'd say that the 10 yr age gap isn't notable, but if you feel it is, I'd recommend moving it to that last sentence in the 1st para
Partly done Changed a good amount, not sure if you still feel this necessary I think you actually did a great job and am happy with the section. The significance of the 10 yr age gap makes sense once it's presented properly in context. I now interpret it as being that Katherine was actually 28, but she claimed she was younger to be closer with Arthur and the stuff ab contemporaries makes sense.
Thank you
- What's the rationale for including the Majory Gene Harkness blockquote?
Comment::The goal with the quote is to introduce the character/charisma of Katherine as it relates to her later achievements. I suppose my thought was to put in a source which cites the importance of her arrival in the section on her arrival. Additionally, it reinforces her organizational skills going into the section on organization. Gotcha, that makes sense, I just felt it was a bit awkward and shoehorned as it breaks the flow imo. I would highly recommend that like the Edgar J. Rich quote, you relocate it to Legacy since it's more specifically about her accomplishments rather than her actual activities, which is the focus of that particular section.
Done
- Does Birch Intervale refer to Ferncroft, New Hampshire, if so, I'd definitely recommend clarifying that. The average person I think wouldn't know what or where that is, so clarifying it's in located in present-day Ferncroft, New Hampshire or something of the like would help
Comment: I'm not certain how best to make that clarification. Birch Intervale was the name of Wonalancet prior to the town's first post office. Meaning there is no Birch Intervale because it is just Wonalancet before it was connected via post I see, I looked at the article and think you actually addressed it very well, so I'm also happy regarding this comment. The wikilink definitely clears things up here, and the rename now makes sense.
Great!
- I don't think the wikilink for ATW is necessary since it may be WP:DUPLINK, speaking of which I think that should be checked for
Not done To be honest, I'm not completely certain on the specific guideline, but ATW is not linked in this section prior to the section's last paragraph so I think that means the link is proper? I'm also a bit rusty when it comes to the more technical MOS requirements. Looking back on it, I see that ATW is linked twice in two distinct headings, which I think is allowed in DUPLINK, so I believe this should be good.¯\_(ツ)_/¯
- Definitely put the Timber Barons sentence a bit later once you provide a bit of context, which you do in the next few sentences. I'd recommend putting it near the Edgar J. Rich quote and rephrasing the sentence so it is like Katherine's conservation of the Bowl and her leadership in protecting the region against New England's "Timber Barons" was considered among her most important accomplishments. I'd even recommend relocating it to Legacy as it'll help flesh out the section a bit more
Partly done I worked on implementing this fully but it was proving a difficult task to properly flow. So, while keeping much of the formatting and placement the same, I changed some phrasing and copied over what fit to the legacy section. I comprehend, it definitely does seem a bit difficult to do. I'd highly recommend relocating that
Often considered her most important and lasting achievement was her fight against the New England "Timber Barons" and her protection of the Bowl.
to Legacy since it's definitely more of a retrospective and reflective declaration imo, and thus more fit for that section while the Conservation section objectively describes her actions in that time period.Done
- On this tangent, I'll introduce another thing. I'll contest this:
The Bowl, now officially called The Bowl Research Natural Area, is one of the last untouched old-growth forests in the American Northeast and is thus regarded as an important site for research.
I would also definitely recommend relocating this material to Legacy for the same rationale above, and connecting this to the sentence of her protection regarding the Bowl, all of this being in Legacy, as I think it'll flow well in the section.Done
three thousand acres (1,200 ha)
Again, note consistency regarding the acreage figs. Good job on including the hectacre fig, but I believe it should be presented numerically, such that it reads3,000 acres (1,200 ha)
. Similar thing for84,000 acres (340 km2)
, which for some reason is converted to km^2 and not ha.DoneOdd that it went to km2, not sure why that would happen. Maybe I misclicked?
- Consistency in the prose of how The Bowl is presented mid-sentence, is it the Bowl in midsentence (kinda like how the consensus is to refer to The Beatles as "the Beatles" mid-sentence and not "The Beatles") or The Bowl?
DoneHonest answer: it's not particularly clear. The only "official" reference is the research area which, being a government entity, is different. It's a local spoken name and I am not a local. I'll just make a gut call.
- To avoid reading like WP:PROSELINE, instead of saying
In 1914,
for the centennial part, may I suggestThat same year,
instead and also merging that part with the para ab the Bowl protection in that same section.DoneNote that the paragraphs are not merged (yet)
- On this tangent, I'll introduce another thing. I'll contest this:
- I concede the "caused a fire" thing as I realize it's all a part of the same clause.
- Note that under Legacy, the Wonalancet Union Chapel sentence is still uncited.
Done
- Also, do note WP:LEADCITE, while the citations on the Lede are good, they are not needed since you do discuss their contents in the body.
Not done:I love WP:LEADCITE, one thing I will note is that it's generally wishy washy so I went for one citation per paragraph here. This did bring to my attention that I had 1 & 2 after the first paragraph so I reined that back in.Dionysius Millertalk 20:57, 14 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller I agree with User:Cooljeanius: It is good practice to omit citations in the lead unless it contains statements that are "Complex, current, or controversial" (MOS:LEADCITE). I would not have added citations in this lead. MOS:LEADCITE does not forbid citations in the lead nor does WP:GAC require compliance with MOS:LEADCITE. Johannes Schade (talk) 09:55, 15 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Johannes Schade Thanks for the input. I concur in that I tend to refrain from citations in the Lede as I feel that it can take up unnecessary space, unless ofc the statements are exceptional, which is the exception. Either way @Dionysius Miller, apologies for being a bit late, but I'll get to reviewing the sources and spotchecks soon, feel free to give me a nudge if I don't manage to get to it by Wednesday. Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:45, 18 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Dcdiehardfan Consider yourself nudged :) Dionysius Millertalk 17:13, 27 March 2024 (UTC)
- Thanks for the reminder. I'm quite late actually in terms of delivery, apologies, I was busy working on my Dune GAN haha. I'll go ahead and commence by today. Dcdiehardfan (talk) 22:07, 27 March 2024 (UTC)
- Since I'm too lazy to do it all in one go, I'll split it up into chunks based on sections. This block will go up to Early Life for now. Before I begin, I'd like to recommend that wherever possible, you archive the sources and include that in the ref formatting, for example as you did in the ref 12 Eagle-Tribune thing using Wayback Machine, and Archive.today in emergency scenarios. You can use the InternetArchive bot I think to help alleviate this burden of manually doing it (I use the Wayback Machine extension too).
- Source Stuff ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
- All the below is based on the edits as of this current version: https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Katherine_Sleeper_Walden&oldid=1213840451.
- [3] → This source substantiates Katherine's birthday, location, and her family history. The problem is that the source primarily discusses Arthur Walden, and it substantiates the parent's names. It doesn't corroborate the birthday, the claim that the Sleepers were an esteemed family, and grandpops. This is a substantial issue, particularly noting the higher threshold for source quality in BLPs, however I'm sure that very easy to find. This definitely should be addressed.
- 2 is Austin 1877 → AGF here, but include Allibone's full name, and if it refers to Samuel Austin Allibone, add an author-link parameter, and btw this is a general note and practice I tend to do, highly recommended but not mandatory, wikilink publisher companies, websites, etc across all refs
- 3 is Evening Star → AGF here, definitely note the article has restricted access, use the |url-access= parameter in the source code, I think you'd type in
|url-access=limited
, and I'd recommend wikilinking the relevant Evening Star the source is cited from since there are multiple - 4 is [PDF] → This is probably the source you need for the majority of Para 1 in Early Life
- 5 is [the Lead chapter] -> Pretty good content, just note it doesn't mention her Roxbury residence, although the April 1995 WODC newspaper source does. Everything else looks bueno.
- 6 is the [WODC newspaper] → All good with me
- 7 is the Burt 1998 source → Again, AGF, but I am going to request some more info on this source and my hits are just nebulous. Can you find an explicit URL to that source or some kind of DOI if it's a research paper or something?
- 8 is the Boardman 2001 source → Also looks all good
- 9 is the Tamworth Narrative from Gane Harkness → The link is [4], is it referring to this book [5] and do you have specific access to content like a PDF or book that's more accessible?
- [6] is source 10 → I'd recommend a higher quality source if possible, and I also don't see any mention of Birch Intervale nor Sandwich Ridge in the source, it only seems to substantiate the 600-ac farm fact, and not really much else. Definitely see if you can add more sources to better corroborate the material prior.
- 11 is Kelly's American Comes Alive article [7] → I actually couldn't access the article for a while, idk, anyways I'd say you could go for better sources, did some digging and found one from the Down East magazine [8], which I think is a higher-quality source than America Comes Alive which seems to be the website of a historian according to Kelly's LinkedIn profile
- 12 is the Hogan 2020 article [9] → DEFINITELY recommend replacing or at the very least adding another as it moreso mentions the Chinook in a tangential manner, if a source is needed corroborating the Chinook as the NH state dog, I recommend this [10] or preferably [11], here's a link in case you get paywalled [12]. If you keep the Hogan article, definitely wikilink it to The Eagle-Tribune
- -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 23:22, 27 March 2024 (UTC)
- 1. Moved source 6 (Wonalancet Out Door Club) to 1 to substantiate birth and family status claims
- 2. Linked S. Allibone. Admittedly, I used my university's lookup in the library to find this book. I hadn't even considered that Allibone might have been an interesting story in and of himself.
- 3. Changed access parameter and linked to the proper paper. As much as I love Newspapers.com and use it frequently, by-God it's overpriced.
- 4. I love that source for its content and it is at the very least a wonderful reference material, but it lacks proper on-page citations. I think it is best used as supporting material alongside another source. Plus, more reliable sources can provide the same content where the claims are of great importance (eg the first paragraph.
- 5. If you get the time at some point, that's actually a pretty good read.
- 6. Note again that 6 is now 1
- 7. Went over to Sallie Joy Wright's page and they cite the same source, picked up the archive link they've got there. Also changed the pages cited from 366-367 to 366-369 because the line where the fact is stated plainly and in full is on the top of page 368. The rest adds useful context to a lay-reader
- 8.
- 9. I have the physical book, I convinced Hillman to purchase a copy for shelving. Since it's public domain I think I'd be allowed to scan and release the book itself, or at least the relevant sections. I've never done that but it sounds like something that I should have the resources to do?
- 10.
I would agree that it's not what I'd call a good source, but it is stating an uncontroversial fact which is substantiated by all other sources. While all of the information stated is also in other sources in this article, it is a more combined source. If you think it necessary this is an easy source to drop and replace.Kate Sleeper [...] opened an inn in Birch Intervale (later renamed to Wonalancet). She bought a 600 acre farm which was the property of the early settler Theophilous Brown.
— Chinook Trail Farm - 11. Love the article you found, throwing it in now. You're right, so this is another source easily dropped. Also, it does take forever to load; not sure why.
- 12. Gracias, replacing
- Dionysius Millertalk 15:16, 29 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller Many apologies for not responding in a punctual manner. I'll do a point-by-point response soon but we're nearly done with references. Good job thus far! I did do a bit of digging, my concern is that when looking at the Death Certificate as per your Chinook History Project source, her name is logged as "Catherine Sleeper Walden" which I think warrants inclusion in the article somewhere. Regarding 9, please do not do that, I've already found the source just for you. [13] page 232 is where the "she was practically the first outsider" quote is. Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:04, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
- To clarify, the PDF digitized the entire book already and the actual PDF page is 274/390, but the book page is 232. Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:05, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
- The different spelling of the name probably isn't too notable, spelling conventions were less than standard until fairly recently and she wrote it as Katherine (see signature). My favorite example of that is if you look up how Shakespeare spelled his name.
- On the pdf: awesome! Dionysius Millertalk 12:11, 8 April 2024 (UTC)
- @Dcdiehardfan Just poking to keep this review rolling Dionysius Millertalk 19:55, 17 April 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller Apologies for being late, again. In terms of actual sources and validity, I think we're fully good there, it's just more technical stuff unfo.
- I would definitely encourage for Source 2, you recite it to this URL instead [14] instead of the Wikimedia link proper since that could lead to concerns ab WP:WINARS, and I just kinda wanna circumvent that issue all together.
- I would say you can eliminate Source 14 since it stands as the weakest source as you incorporated the Down East and Boston Globe articles (which I'm grateful for btw)
- Provide a
|url-access=limited
parameter for Source 15's Boston Globe, I think depending on cache, you can either fully access the article or if not, you'll be paywalled. And on that tangent, I'd also highly recommend inserting in an archived version (but this isn't mandatory) - Again, for Source 18, definitely include the
|url-access=subscribed
parameter since it's Newspaper.com, and as you note, it's pricey lol. Ditto for Source 24. - For Source 22, add a parameter
|via=Newspaper.com
to maintain consistency with you how formatted those other refs and also add|url-access=subscribed
- I believe once this is all addressed, we have a GA in our hands! Let me know when you address the concerns. :)
- -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 22:04, 18 April 2024 (UTC)
- Source 2 - I changed this so that it has the original link and an "archive" link. That seems most accurate since, as far as .JPGs and .PNGs go, the commons is a de facto archive. Plus, just makes a stable link just in case. I don't think this could lead a WINARS situation since it isn't a claim, but a public file.
- Source 14 - Gone, plus removes a little clutter
- Source 15 - Didn't even realize, I use a firefox extension to remove news paywalls (questionably legal, idk. Very nice for Wikipedia though). Added the tag.
- Source 18, 22, & 24 - Done. Frankly, I usually ignore that since I (generally) do the via tag, but it is semantically necessary. Plus my goal is to get this article specifically to FA so every bit helps.
- Thank you so much for your diligent and in-depth help! You have irreplaceably helped to build up, correct, check, and (mostly) perfect this article. You have taken some deep dives and it is by far the most in depth review I've ever seen. Dionysius Millertalk 16:33, 19 April 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller I think we're good with everything yea. All the source concerns should've been appropriately resolved. And honestly, I can't say I don't condone the extensions things, I have my own methods, but the convention I think is that if possible, articles tend to provide archival links that have the article unpaywalled basically. And of course, it was my pleasure, I always prioritize quality over quantity, and this is the first kind of GAR endeavor I've participated to in this extent, and I'm very glad to be of help! With that being said, I think I'm content with passing the article at this time. @Cooljeanius is absolutely encouraged to give their inputs, and if there's no response in at least 2 weeks, give me a ping back or be sure to take the necessary actions to resolve the matter. Congrats! :) -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:31, 20 April 2024 (UTC)
- I mean yeah I've thought it's been fine to pass for awhile now, so whatever actions are necessary, feel free to take them. Cooljeanius (talk) (contribs) 05:53, 20 April 2024 (UTC)
- @Cooljeanius Sounds good. Since you are the original reviewer, you should do the honors and pass the GAR. -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 23:18, 20 April 2024 (UTC)
- I mean yeah I've thought it's been fine to pass for awhile now, so whatever actions are necessary, feel free to take them. Cooljeanius (talk) (contribs) 05:53, 20 April 2024 (UTC)
- Last paragraph mentions North and South Sleeper but elsewhere East and West Sleeper. 220.253.240.106 (talk) 12:07, 16 May 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller I think we're good with everything yea. All the source concerns should've been appropriately resolved. And honestly, I can't say I don't condone the extensions things, I have my own methods, but the convention I think is that if possible, articles tend to provide archival links that have the article unpaywalled basically. And of course, it was my pleasure, I always prioritize quality over quantity, and this is the first kind of GAR endeavor I've participated to in this extent, and I'm very glad to be of help! With that being said, I think I'm content with passing the article at this time. @Cooljeanius is absolutely encouraged to give their inputs, and if there's no response in at least 2 weeks, give me a ping back or be sure to take the necessary actions to resolve the matter. Congrats! :) -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:31, 20 April 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller Apologies for being late, again. In terms of actual sources and validity, I think we're fully good there, it's just more technical stuff unfo.
- @Dionysius Miller Many apologies for not responding in a punctual manner. I'll do a point-by-point response soon but we're nearly done with references. Good job thus far! I did do a bit of digging, my concern is that when looking at the Death Certificate as per your Chinook History Project source, her name is logged as "Catherine Sleeper Walden" which I think warrants inclusion in the article somewhere. Regarding 9, please do not do that, I've already found the source just for you. [13] page 232 is where the "she was practically the first outsider" quote is. Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:04, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
- Thanks for the reminder. I'm quite late actually in terms of delivery, apologies, I was busy working on my Dune GAN haha. I'll go ahead and commence by today. Dcdiehardfan (talk) 22:07, 27 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Dcdiehardfan Consider yourself nudged :) Dionysius Millertalk 17:13, 27 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Johannes Schade Thanks for the input. I concur in that I tend to refrain from citations in the Lede as I feel that it can take up unnecessary space, unless ofc the statements are exceptional, which is the exception. Either way @Dionysius Miller, apologies for being a bit late, but I'll get to reviewing the sources and spotchecks soon, feel free to give me a nudge if I don't manage to get to it by Wednesday. Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:45, 18 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Dionysius Miller I agree with User:Cooljeanius: It is good practice to omit citations in the lead unless it contains statements that are "Complex, current, or controversial" (MOS:LEADCITE). I would not have added citations in this lead. MOS:LEADCITE does not forbid citations in the lead nor does WP:GAC require compliance with MOS:LEADCITE. Johannes Schade (talk) 09:55, 15 March 2024 (UTC)