Talk:2010 LifeLock.com 400/GA1

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Reviewer: Gonzo fan2007 (talk · contribs) 04:46, 10 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Good Article review progress box Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV () 3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant () Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

• I'll review this one in the next few days! Cheers, « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 04:46, 10 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Copyedit

• I made some minor edits. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 19:30, 10 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

• Link "EDT" to Eastern Time Zone
  •  Done Kpgjhpjm 03:01, 11 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
• Per WP:LEADCITE, remove the citation from the lead
  •  Done. Kpgjhpjm 15:44, 11 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
• "Carl Edwards finished second, and Jeff Gordon finished third." - you don't need the comma. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 19:30, 10 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  •  Done

Race report

• "In the battle for third place, Dodge had 78 points, now even with Ford." - recommend changing to the simpler "Dodge and Ford were tied for third place with 78 points."
  • I have tweaked the sentence a bit from the suggestion. Kpgjhpjm 15:44, 11 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
• "In the first practice session, which was held in dry conditions," - was the second race not held in dry conditions? Why is this important to note?
  • Removed, I was planning to do it before the review but thought of the reviewer's opinion . Kpgjhpjm 15:44, 11 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
• " Tony Stewart only managed to qualify third, and Greg Biffle qualified fourth." - why "only"? Recommend removing.
  •  Done Kpgjhpjm 15:44, 11 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
• "Conditions were sunny with a high 88 °F (31 °C), making the track potentially slippery early in the race." - why would sunny weather be slippery?
  • Tweaked by adding a line from citation . Kpgjhpjm 15:44, 11 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
• "who had stated second passed McMurray to lead the first lap." - do you mean "started"?
  •  Done
• "Two laps later, David Reutimann moved into sixth, after passing Sam Hornish, Jr.." - the period in his name is sufficient. You can remove the 2nd one.
  • I am a bit confused here . What do you mean by second one ?
    • Sorry Kpgjhpjm, I mean that the period in Sam Hornish, Jr. name is sufficient to end a sentence. You don't need "Jr.." - it can just be "Jr." « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 15:56, 11 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
      • But that is a full stop. Kpgjhpjm 15:08, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
        • Kpgjhpjm Yes, but only one period is needed to indicate a full stop, even if it is part of an abbreviation or post-nominal letters. Two consecutive periods should almost never be used. See http://www.thepunctuationguide.com/period.html or https://www.chicagomanualofstyle.org/qanda/data/faq/topics/Punctuation/faq0040.html. Also, just search "two periods grammar" in Google and you will see the universally accepted standards. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 15:20, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
          •  Done
• "The green flag waved on lap 136, with McMurray and Johnson in first and second." - what does the green flag indicate?
  • A restart after a caution. Added . Kpgjhpjm 15:44, 11 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
• "On lap 166, McMurray was passed by Jeff Gordon for the lead of the race." - can probably drop "of the race" as it is implied.
  •  Done Kpgjhpjm 15:44, 11 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
• You link engine failure, which redirects to Turbine engine failure, which is about airplanes. I think engine failure is a simple enough concept that you can leave it unlinked.
  •  Done
• I have a few general concerns about the "Race" subsection:
  • Admittedly, I am not very familiar with these types of articles, but this section seems too detailed and long. If there are a few examples of similar good articles you could point me to, that would alleviate my concern.
  • This sub-section is reliant on almost one source. It is not a huge deal, but it would be nice to have at least a few different sources. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 21:08, 10 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
    • I can't find another one here .
      • @Gonzo fan2007: You can find all Category:GA-Class NASCAR articles here. Kpgjhpjm 15:54, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
        • @Gonzo fan2007: Last ping did not work, see Category:GA-Class NASCAR articles. 15:58, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
          • Thanks, note that you have to add a colon before the link to link to a category, i.e. [[:Category:GA-Class NASCAR articles]]. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 16:02, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Classification

• Please make the "Qualifying" table sortable.
  •  Done Kpgjhpjm 16:15, 11 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Use the {{Abbr}} for the "No" column. Usually "No" is represented with a period, thus No.
    •  Done Kpgjhpjm 15:44, 11 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Not a big NASCAR guy, what is "Grid"?
    • It means starting position. Kpgjhpjm 15:44, 11 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Why the break between Travis Kvapil and Michael McDowell in the table?
    • Because they failed to qualify. Added . Kpgjhpjm 15:23, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
• In both tables, Source should be Sources, and put a space after the colon but before the references themselves. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 19:30, 10 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  •  Done

Standings after the race

• No comments. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 19:30, 10 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Images

• Per WP:IMAGESIZE, please remove all of the fixed px sizes in the images. Thumbnails default size and are more accessible.
  •  Done
• In my opinion, File:JamieMcMurrayBristolAugust2007.jpg should be on the right side of the article. The formatting looks much better, and I even previewed it in various screen sizes.
  •  Done
• File:2008 LifeLock.com 400 logo.png - a fair use logo, properly tagged and rationale for use in this article
• File:Chicagolandspeedway.jpg - PD aerial, looks good
• File:JamieMcMurrayBristolAugust2007.jpg - free use and properly tagged
• File:David Reutimann 2008 Aarons Toyota Camry.jpg - free use and properly tagged
• File:TSM350 - 2015 - Kevin Harvick - Stierch 4 Cropped.jpg - free use and properly tagged (note my small edit on Wikimedia Commons) « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 19:30, 10 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]

References

• Reference 14 is dead and should be removed/replaced per WP:DEADREF
  •  Done Kpgjhpjm 15:29, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
• Reference 16 is dead
  •  Done
• You use the |location= parameter in a few references. This parameter is for the physical publishing location, not the website. I would remove or replace with |website=
  •  Done
• Everything else looks good. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 19:41, 10 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Overall

• Per MOS:DUPLINK, please remove all of the double links that are found in the main body of the article (mostly the names of the drivers). Duplicate links are ok in the lead, infobox, and table, but usually not the main body of the article. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 19:41, 10 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  •  Done If three is any left please tell me .Kpgjhpjm 15:42, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
    • I found some more. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 16:00, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
• Review is done. Let me know when you have resolved/commented on all the items. Cheers, « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 21:08, 10 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • @Gonzo fan2007: I have commented on everything. If I have missed out on something , please let me know. Kpgjhpjm 15:54, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
    • @Gonzo fan2007: Is there anything else that needs to be fixed. Kpgjhpjm 16:05, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
      • I am reviewing everything now. I'll get back to you shortly. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 16:06, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
      • Everything looks good. Nice work! Passed. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 16:10, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]
        • @Gonzo fan2007: Thanks for your time to review this article. Kpgjhpjm 16:12, 12 September 2018 (UTC)[reply]